|
2011年9月号的德国周报DIE ZEIT里,Orlando分享了他不为人知的私密梦境
Orlando Bloom
"I was falling far, I could have died"
I'm in the jungle, alone. A tiger approaches with smooth movements, my heartbeat is accelerating. It's a terrifying beast. It lies down a few meters away from me. I advance cautiously and lie down next to him, curled up like a fetus. The tiger puts his paws around my body, his breath on my neck. I start adapting to the tiger's rhythm of breathing. Eventually we breathe harmoniously, I'm in tune with this wild creature. It feels fantastic. Seven years ago I had this dream for the first time, and since then several times. Every time I wake up after this dream, I long to be able to immerse myself again into this emotion. It's the most amazing and most in depth dream I ever had.
I think this dream is about fear and overcoming fear. Fear is not pleasant. That's why I try to offer fear not too much room in my life. But fear is also an important corrective, it helps distinguishing the possible from the impossible. I once learned improper handling of fear the hard way: When I was in my early twenties, I fell from a roof at the daft attempt to climb over a rain gutter to reach a friend's roof terrace. I was falling far, I could have died. I survived with severe injuries, being on an operating table for six hours after that. The doctors told me I would probably never be able to walk again. This image was a nightmare for me. I've done everything to get back on my feet again.
This fall was a life changing experience. Before this, I've rushed through life, always on the edge, always ran on adrenaline. The accident has taught me to appreciate life, to appreciate the moment. To appreciate my limitations. It forced me to back-pedal and to shift down a gear. I had to learn to walk again painstakingly. Until today I have to excercise to reduce the back pain, it's a constant lesson for me. It probably sounds stereotype: I've learned to be happy because I'm alive and able to walk. To be famous and rich leads to some comfort, though it's not that much of an importance to me. It doesn't define who I am.
When I was four years old my mother's husband died, who I believed was my father. About ten years later I learned that he wasn't my biological father. These incidents haven shaken me to the core.
It's possible that my drive to take risks originated from this, a drive which pushed me on for such a long time. I was always a thrill seeker. To this day I love to do extreme sports. The emotional high, the adrenaline lets me feel that I'm alive. Since I became a father and carry a resposibility for my family, I struggle to limit risks, a lot more than I did before. It is possible that all these elements of my life meet up in this dream about the tiger.
|
|